Modern culture keeps asking whether we can afford to have children, but I often wonder whether we can afford not to have them.
Let me be clear: raising a family of 10 costs money. Our grocery cart sometimes looks like we are preparing for the end of civilization, and apparently, children’s feet can grow an entire shoe size on the drive home from the store. 😂
But I refuse to look at our seven children as seven financial liabilities. They are blessings from God, and part of raising them is teaching them that they are valuable members of our family who are capable of contributing to it.
That does not mean children exist to make their parents money or that their worth depends on how productive they are. It means childhood should not be 18 years of being served while learning to expect someone else to provide everything. A family is not a hotel, and parents were never meant to be the unpaid staff.
Our children help clean the house, prepare meals, work in the garden, care for one another, solve problems, and build businesses. Sometimes teaching them takes much longer than doing things ourselves. Sometimes the kitchen looks worse after they “help.” But the goal is not merely to finish today’s work. The goal is to raise tomorrow’s capable adults.
For most of history, children learned by working alongside their families. They learned that their hands, ideas, creativity, and effort could make life better for the people around them. Today, we often remove every responsibility from childhood and then wonder why adulthood feels overwhelming.
Scripture calls children a blessing, a reward, and arrows in the hands of a warrior. I want to treat them that way, not as burdens to manage or consumers to entertain, but as people created by God with gifts to develop, work to do, and something meaningful to contribute.
The greatest gift we can give our children is not a life where they never have to work. It is the confidence to know they are capable of doing hard things.
When children learn to cook a meal, care for a younger sibling, save their money, grow vegetables, or solve a problem without immediately asking someone else to fix it, they are learning lessons that go far beyond household chores. They are developing patience, responsibility, gratitude, independence, and the understanding that their actions matter.
These lessons will follow them into adulthood, into their future marriages, into their careers, and eventually into the families they may build themselves.
Of course, children still need time to play, explore, rest, make mistakes, and simply be children. Responsibility should never replace love, and helping at home should never become a measure of a child’s value. The goal is to prepare them for life while making sure they always know they are loved, even on the days when they accomplish absolutely nothing.
And perhaps that is one of the most important things a large family can teach us: we are not meant to live only for ourselves.
We need one another. We need the patience to teach, the humility to accept help, and the willingness to share both the work and the rewards of building a home together.
So yes, raising seven children is expensive. There are bills to pay, mouths to feed, clothes to replace, and endless expenses that seem to appear overnight. We have to budget, plan, sacrifice, and make difficult decisions like every other family.
But when I look at our children, I see more than the cost of raising them. I see future adults who can think independently, work with their hands, care for others, create opportunities, and make a difference in the world.
Money matters, and responsible family planning matters, too. Every family must make decisions according to its own circumstances, resources, and convictions. But perhaps we should also ask what we lose when we measure the value of children only in dollars.
Children bring love, laughter, purpose, challenges, and countless opportunities to grow. They remind us that life is not simply about accumulating possessions or making everything convenient. Sometimes, the most meaningful things we build require the greatest investment of our time, energy, and hearts.
I want my children to grow up understanding that they are not entitled to everything, but they are capable of much more than they realize. I want them to know that their presence matters, their work has value, and their family is stronger because they are part of it.
Because raising children is not just about providing for them today. It is about preparing them to live well tomorrow.
🔥 If you believe children should be raised with love, faith, responsibility, and practical life skills, share this message with another parent.
Now I want to hear from you: What is one meaningful way your children contribute to your family? Do they help cook, clean, care for younger siblings, work in the garden, or take part in a small family business?
Share your thoughts in the comments. Your experience might inspire another parent to start teaching their children a valuable life skill today.
