For years, I drove two hours every Friday to visit a small suburban café, leaving unusually large tips for one particular waitress. What she didn’t know was that I carried a life-changing secret in my purse. I just wished I could find the courage to share it.
The Friday evening traffic crawled along the interstate as I made my way out of downtown. My colleagues at the law firm thought I was crazy to drive two hours just for dinner at some suburban café, but they didn’t understand. I didn’t go for the coffee or the sandwiches. I went to see her.
The café sat on a quiet corner, its red-brick exterior softened by white trim. It also had a white awning and window boxes full of purple petunias. The bell above the door chimed as I pushed it open, and the familiar scent of coffee and fresh-baked pie made me feel at home.
She looked up when I walked in—the waitress with kind eyes and silver-streaked hair. Her name tag read “Martha,” but I’d known that long before I ever set foot in this place.
Every time I saw her, I thought about what I held in my purse. And yet, I never knew if I would be brave enough to show it to her that day.
“Welcome back, hon,” she said, already reaching for the coffee pot. “Your usual spot?”
I nodded, sliding into my regular booth by the window. The vinyl seats squeaked beneath me, and the tabletop showed years of wear under its polished surface.
Martha set down a mug of black coffee and pulled out her order pad, though we both knew what I wanted. “Apple pie and an espresso?” she asked, her pen hovering over the paper.
“Yes, please.”
Her smile carried a warmth that made my chest ache. Did she ever wonder about me? Did she even remember me?
The truth sat heavy in my purse, wrapped in a manila envelope that was starting to show wear from months of being carried back and forth. Inside were the documents from the adoption agency, the ones that had turned my world upside down just a few months ago.
I still remember the day I finally confronted my adoptive parents about my past. Mother had been arranging flowers in their living room, each stem placed with surgical precision.
“We gave you everything,” she’d said, not bothering to look up from her roses. “The best schools, the finest opportunities. Why isn’t that enough?”
“Because it’s not about things, Mother. It’s about knowing who I am.”
“You’re one of us,” Father had interjected from behind his iPad. “That’s who you are. But if you insist on pursuing this… project, contact the agency yourself. We won’t stand in your way.”
His tone made it clear they wouldn’t help, either. After 38 years, I should have expected nothing less. My adoptive family had always treated emotions like unwelcome houseguests.
Luckily, I didn’t have trouble contacting the agency, and their response arrived faster than I’d expected. As I read through the documents in my condo, pieces of my past clicked into place.
My birth mother had died bringing me into the world. My birth father had been too overwhelmed by grief and responsibility, so he had walked away. And then there was Martha—my foster mother for two precious years.
She was the one spot of warmth I remembered from my entire childhood. Unfortunately, her husband’s cancer diagnosis forced them to make an impossible choice.
Martha returned with my pie, setting it down with the same care she always showed. “Anything else you need, sweetie?”
I opened my mouth, willing the words to come. The envelope pressed against my ribs through my purse. Just tell her, I thought. Just reach in, pull it out, and tell her.
Instead, I shook my head and smiled weakly. “No, thank you.”
She lingered a moment longer than usual, and I wondered if she sensed something. Did she see how my hands shook slightly as I picked up my fork?
If she did, she said nothing and went to another table while I started eating my pie. When I finished, I left my usual $50 tip on the table. It was excessive for coffee and pie, but how do you put a price on lost time?
Maybe I also left so much because I felt guilty for not being brave enough to tell her who I was today, either. Why was it that I could face the most intimidating lawyers in court without sweating, but this part of my past had me acting like a little girl?
I was disappointed in myself, so I stood. Next Friday, I’ll do it for sure, I promised.
Rain had started to fall heavily outside. I fumbled with my umbrella, almost dropping my keys on my way to my car.
“Hey, you!”
I froze, my keys hovering near the car door lock.
“Why are you doing this?!”
I turned to see Martha standing a few feet away, still in her work apron. She held up the money I’d given her.
“Every week, you come in,” she continued, taking a step closer. “You sit quietly, leave these large tips, and disappear. Why?”
My heart pounded so hard I thought it might break through my ribs. This was the moment I’d both longed for and dreaded. Yet, I knew I had to take this chance.
“I… I have something for you.” My voice sounded strange to my own ears as I reached into my purse with trembling fingers.
The envelope was slightly bent at the corners now.
“Could you please read this?” I asked, holding it out. “When you have a moment?”
Martha took it slowly, confusion drawing her brows together. “What is this about?”
“It’s about me,” I whispered. “About us.”
She opened it right there, heedless of the rain. I watched her face as she read and saw the moment recognition dawned. Her hand flew to her mouth, and she stumbled backward.
“Oh my God,” she breathed. “Sarah? My little Sarah?”
I nodded, tears spilling down my cheeks. “Yeah…”
We just looked at one another for an infinite moment.
“Oh, sweetie. I see from these documents that you must have figured out what happened. But you have to understand that John… my husband, your foster father… he got so sick,” she said finally. “The bills kept piling up. This couple came along. They were so wealthy. They could give you everything we couldn’t.”
“I understand perfectly,” I said softly, and I did. I knew they did what they thought was best for me. She didn’t need to explain herself. “What happened to John?”
“Cancer took him three years after you were adopted…” She swallowed hard. “He loved you so much, Sarah. We both did. Every day since we let you go, I’ve wondered if we made the right choice.”
“I have… fragments of memories,” I admitted. “Someone reading ‘Goodnight Moon.’ The smell of cookies baking. A man’s laugh. Me calling you Momma. I always told myself I was making it up.”
Martha nodded through her tears. “You wouldn’t go to sleep without that book,” she smiled. “And John would spend hours in the kitchen with you, letting you ‘help’ make cookies. You were only two, but you were so determined to do everything yourself. As soon as you could speak, you called us Momma and Papa.”
The rain came down harder, soaking us even more. Eager to hear more, we ran and waited below the awning in front of the café.
Martha told me about my early days, about the love that had filled their modest home. I shared stories about growing up with my adoptive parents. I was financially secure, yes, but emotionally… that was a different story.
“I contacted the agency a few months ago and started coming here,” I confessed after telling her about my current life and career. “Every time I tried to tell you, I lost my nerve.”
“So you left those tips instead?” Martha’s eyes crinkled with understanding.
“It was the only way I knew how to reach out.”
Suddenly, we heard a sharp tap on the window. It was Martha’s manager, beckoning her inside. “I have to go back to work,” she told me, her eyebrows pulling down apologetically. “Will you come next Friday?”
“Actually… could we maybe do breakfast instead? Tomorrow?”
“Oh, honey,” Martha said, wrapping me into the best hug I’d ever gotten. “I would love nothing more.” When we separated, she pulled out her phone. “Here, write down my number.”
“Thank you,” I said, after putting my phone back in my pocket. “Bye, Momma.”
Martha’s hand flew to her mouth at my words. “Bye, sweetie. See you soon.”
The rain stopped as I drove back to the city, and stars peeked through breaks in the clouds.
I couldn’t wait to see her again.
Don’t get me wrong. I knew my life, despite its beginning, had been privileged; my adoptive parents had provided everything they could, paving the way for all my success. For that, I will always be grateful.
But sometimes, pure warmth and love are all a person needs. I had experienced that with Momma and Papa, and now, at least, I had her back in my life.
